“He will cover you with his feathers; you will take refuge under His wings. His faithfulness will be a protective shield.” Psalm 91:4 CSB
Today is the five year anniversary of God calling Cody boy back to Him. He died from the terrible disease of diabetes. The verse above is the one my family and I have clung to since that day. When we find a feather, to us, it is Cody saying hello from heaven. I’d like to share a little bit of him with you today. His presence in my life, for the brief 20 years we had him, was amazing. He helped me grow and love like I never had before him. He was not perfect, no one is, but he was perfect to me. Cody had an old soul, he was wiser than I will ever be. There was a period of time where I was fighting with his dad, we weren’t speaking. Cody was better than both of us, he rose above the family squabble and loved us both. He was an amazing young man.
I recently started therapy, it has helped me immensely, although it was very difficult for me to do. God is taking me on an interesting journey. My therapist is having me read a book on grief. She gave the book to me two weeks ago, it took me a week and a half before I could pick it up. Once I started reading it, I started identifying with what it was saying. The book, “On Grief and Grieving: Finding the Meaning of Grief through the Five Stages of Loss,” by Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, M.D. and David Kessler, was written while Elisabeth was dying. In fact, she died before the book was completed and David finished the book. My therapist is helping me understand grief is an ongoing process, it doesn’t magically end one day. I’ve begun to realize, I’m still grieving the loss of my Dad over 30 years ago. But it is also teaching me about the circle of life and death. We always want to talk about life, but we don’t like to talk about death.
Life and death are interconnected, neither should be feared when your life is in Christ. My favorite story from the book so far is about Margaret and Frank, a couple who had been married 50 years. Margaret had a terminal illness, she was petrified of dying because she would leave Frank. She couldn’t bare the thought of being apart from him. Just hours before she died, Margaret told Frank, it was finally ok to go. When Frank asked, “Why now?”, Margaret responded, “Because God told me you’re already there.” This puzzled Frank until he realized, God and heaven are outside of time and space. On earth, it may be another 10 years before Frank sees Maragaret again, but where Margaret is going, it will seem like only a couple of seconds have passed. I’ve also learned, in the last five years, I love Cody more now than ever. He lives on in me, and my family. He touched so many lives, every life he touched carries him with them. We may be physically apart, but we are always spiritually connected. One day, we’ll see each other again, and it will only seem like seconds.
I hope this brings comfort to any broken hearts out there. Pray for my sister-in-law Jill today as she grieves the loss of her son on this anniversary.